he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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