i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
