meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
