It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
