foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
