Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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