I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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