I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
