She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
