Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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