Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
