Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
