Already got asked if we're dating
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
