You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize