yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
We just shotgunned beers for America
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Randomize
