Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
