apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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