Taylor Swift is so right about you.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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