either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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