I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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