Barsexuality is the new black.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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