I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize