it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
