Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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