If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize