I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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