U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
