The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
