Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
it was like eating out sand paper
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
