Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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