I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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