I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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