When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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