yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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