with your own penis?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
