OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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