a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
