forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
