well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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