you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
