508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
