oh god the rape fog is back!
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Can I color on your dick again?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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