i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize
