Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
