please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
