I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
