Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
