i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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