so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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