We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize