if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Holy sore nipples Batman
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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