You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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